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| | I Probably Hate You Because |
 | | If you’re not, I probably hate you because you expect me to speak Spanish, even after knowing that I was born and raised in New York City. |
 | | If you’re two years old, I most likely hate you because you’ll always be cuter than me, fat looks good on you, you can drool without being smacked by your wife, and you probably make more sense than I do. |
 | | If you’re a woman, I most likely hate you because you grew your own boobs at twelve, and I had to wait until I was twenty-five to get a pair for myself. |
| www.g-pop.net /IHateu.htm (668 words) |
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