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| | Chess - Uncyclopedia (Site not responding. Last check: 2007-10-08) |
 | | After the end of the Dark Ages, which chess boards returned to nailing wooden boards to cats and witches, Chess has become exceedingly despised, and is used as a form or corporal punishment, and a way to make sure old people have something boring and dull to keep occupied with. |
 | | When first made, chess games would end before they started, but the king, whose name was Bill Gates decided that the game was too short, as such he introduced a rule that all chess players must think about there next turn until the opponent shows sign of extreme annoyance, and then wait for ten minutes. |
 | | Chess historians speculate that this is because of homophobic discrimination against fairy chess pieces. |
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