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Topic: Toilet humour


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In the News (Thu 21 Aug 14)

  
  Toilet humour - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Toilet humour or potty humour (humor in American English) is a type of humour dealing with defecation, urination and other bodily functions.
Toilet humour also refers to jokes around modesty, such as if one is seen naked or in his/her undergarments.
In The Simpsons, Bart flushed a cherry bomb down the boys' toilet, and the subsequent force of the explosion in the pipes caused Agnes Skinner to be blown off the girls' toilet by the sudden gush.
en.wikipedia.org /wiki/Toilet_humour   (686 words)

  
 When Good Toilets... Go BAD!
Paul Sanders was fixing a disabled toilet in Frankley on Thursday at around 1015 BST when his leg flipped a switch causing his neck to become wedged in a motorised section of the device.
The toilets are brought in by city residents, lined up in front of a dumpster, and then tossed in by their human toilet destructor - a big burly guy who smells like old piss from manhandling toilets all day.
When the dying toilets fly into the dumpster, they cry out one last time with a very loud, prolonged "shattering" sound that was so shrill and foul, the TV station had to mute the reporter's microphone while he was doing his remote.
home.att.net /~toyletbowlbbs/toilets.htm   (5050 words)

  
 Johnny Foreigner's Guide to British Humour - Uncyclopedia
The development of humour was slow during the Dark Ages that followed, mostly because French people ruled the country and as everyone knows French people have a rubbish sense of humour.
The use of actors allowed the spreading of humour further than ever before as their main job was to ram humour down the throats of those who came to watch them.
Playground humour is the type of humour practised in Britain only in the playground by small children below the age of 6, but in America is the dominant form of humour and is called Humor.
uncyclopedia.org /wiki/Johnny_Foreigner's_Guide_to_British_Humour   (2246 words)

  
 Toilet Humour Cartoons
Related topics: optimism, optimist, optimists, pessimist, pessimists, toilets, loo, drink loo, drink toilet, drink loos, drink toilets, pessimism, dog, dogs, pets, pet, attitude, attitudes, toilet, toilet humor, life, outlook, viewpoint, toilet humour, view of life, bright side of life,
Related topics: humor, humour, caveman, cavemen, invention, invent, invents, lavatorial humour, lavatorial humor, toilet paper, loo paper, loo roll, neanderthal, toilets, toilet, toilet humor, toilet humour,
There are more than 10 "toilet humour" cartoons click here to view the full selection.
www.cartoonstock.com /directory/t/toilet_humour.asp   (809 words)

  
 Art toilet offers views of London - Peculiar Postings - MSNBC.com
An art exhibit of a usable toilet enclosed in a cube of one-way glass is seen across the road from London's Tate Britain Museum.
A look-out toilet that permits you to see out when using it is a new exhibit that keeps London visitors wondering.
The use of the sterile prison toilet and sink unit stems from the fact that the site once housed the Millbank Penitentiary, where prisoners were held before being transported to Australia in the 1800s.
www.msnbc.msn.com /id/4326340   (972 words)

  
 World Toilet Organization
There are presently no comprehensive toilet educational institutions that address both urban and rural toilets' needs in a continuous manner.
The toilets must be kept clean, and all germs should be disinfected before it comes in contact with patrons of the toilet such as elderly and pregnant women.
Imagine strategically positioning toilets and utilities in the toilet to be used by customers even if they are normal users, elderly or handicapped.
www.worldtoilet.org /hp/wto_hp.htm   (514 words)

  
 Sunday 28th November 2004 | Warming Up | RichardHerring.com   (Site not responding. Last check: 2007-10-18)
It seems a lot of expense to build a toilet that would be capable of disposing of all kinds of waste products and then use it solely for the jettisoning of perfectly good tissue paper.
There was no sign telling me what was or wasn't allowed in there (although you might argue that the sign by the toilet possibly implied that I mustn't put tissue paper in the sink, as it was only allowed to go in the toilet).
Now logic may dicate, based on previous experience that what the owners of the cafe were asking was that their patrons did not put paper towels or sanitary towels or nappies or other such unflushable items into their lavatory.
www.richardherring.com /warmingup/warmingup.php?id=745   (1041 words)

  
 Toilet humour: the perils of Public Loos exposed (via CobWeb/3.1 planetlab2.cs.virginia.edu)   (Site not responding. Last check: 2007-10-18)
Toilets may have improved a bit since then (though not in France), but taking a pee is still fraught with more unseen dangers for us girls than exploring the uncharted rain forests of the Amazon.
The door hits your handbag, which thumps you in the chest and you and your bag topple backward against the toilet cistern—which is disconcertingly wet.
By this time, the automatic sensor on the back of the toilet is so confused that it flushes, sending up a stream of water to rival Niagara Falls that sucks everything down with such force that you grab onto the toilet paper dispenser for fear of having your bottom dragged off to Australia.
www.utterpants.co.uk.cob-web.org:8888 /fiction/toiletfun.html   (1477 words)

  
 The Toilet Museum. Toilette Internationale
These are international toilets that belong in a category all their own (mostly because I can't figure out where else to put them).
Unlike her brother, Manneken, who has been urinating for centuries, Jeanneke Pis is a relative newcomer, having been commissioned by a group of local merchants and installed in the 1980's.
When I tell someone I have a picture of the toilet at the Taj Mahal, I'm always surprised at how disappointed they are when they see it.
www.toiletmuseum.com /internationale.html   (554 words)

  
 Humour Toilet Seats from Bathroom Express
Exact colour matches to the photograph can not be guaranteed, but, the use of light resistant polyurathane laquers ensure brilliance and endurance of the colours and colour exactitude for follow on orders can be guaranteed.
The Ball Field Toilet Seat is available with a complimenting range of bathroom accessories.
The Pop Art Toilet Seat is available with a complimenting range of bathroom accessories.
www.bathroomexpress.co.uk /acatalog/0401_humour_toilet_seats.html   (1235 words)

  
 Toilet Humour - Jokes Database (via CobWeb/3.1 planetlab2.cs.virginia.edu)   (Site not responding. Last check: 2007-10-18)
one day cody was going into the ladys toilet when he herd the most horibale sound som lady was shiting her pants so cody ran over and helped her out he asked do want help and she said yes just can u open my two bum cheeks up cody said sure and they b...[more]
three guys are needing to go toilet really badly, so one guy walks in to a public toilet and uses it, ignoring the sign saying "beware of the toilet ghost, he finishes his crap and wipes his bum, and then he heard a BOO so he ran out the second guy...[more]
The doctor tells him that he is very ill, but that he can cure andgt;his condition with a course of suppositories inserted deep into his rectum andgt;every 6 hours.
jokes.boo.co.nz.cob-web.org:8888 /uploads/4092/Toilet-Humour.html   (736 words)

  
 TheSpoof.com : NASA: "Toilet humour is alien to us." funny satire story
A spokesman for NASA said the phenomenon, first discovered in a remote town in northern Idaho last November, was a burgeoning cause for concern.
Jerry T. Sanderson, a leading light in the study of inter-stellar oddities, explained: "It appears a colony of rogue extra terrestrials, using the unrivalled power of a multitasking wormhole, are abusing the global sewage network to kidnap people when they're at their most vulnerable.
The latest terrifying incident took place at an isolated toilet block near the ferry terminal at Stranraer in Scotland, where 25 Glasgow pensioners stopped refreshments en-route to County Wicklow in Ireland.
www.thespoof.com /news/spoof.cfm?headline=s5i7630   (614 words)

  
 Lots of Jokes - Taking A Dump
You sit down expecting the worse, but what you get is a smooth sliding, fart-less masterpiece that breaks the water with the splash-less grace of an Olympic high-diving champion.
You use the toilet tissue to find that it was totally unnecessary.
Ahhh, you've done, so you wipe, dress, flush, wash hands and are about to leave the auditorium when you feel another dump coming on.
www.lotsofjokes.com /cat_270.htm   (665 words)

  
 Tjilpi: Airport Toilet Humour
There were just as many bugs on the plate which had been touched with the finger which was supposedly protected by the four layers of toilet paper as there were on the plate touched by the unprotected finger.
You use the toilet and wipe yourself with toilet paper.
Then, just as you are about to leave the toilet and go outside, you take a look at yourself in the mirror to see if your dress alignment is right.
tjilpi.typepad.com /tjilpi/2006/05/toilet_humour.html   (1029 words)

  
 Anthony and Max in hot water over toilet humour | the Daily Mail
They were sent mopping after the housemates complained about the boys throwing around water using a toilet brush holder.
He appeared unfazed that the toilet water was splattered in the kichen.
Maxwell is an idiot and this stupid behaviour of flicking water everywhere from a toilet brush holder is just typical of him.
www.dailymail.co.uk /pages/live/articles/showbiz/bigbrother.html?in_article_id=354926&in_page_id=1815   (540 words)

  
 Toilet humour   (Site not responding. Last check: 2007-10-18)
I am not one for toilet humour but here's a funny story anyway
Here's a story from the U.K. An explosion blew the roof off a public toilet on Wednesday in the English city of Stoke-on-Trent.
He said the explosion, which happened about 4 a.m., had been caused by a high voltage power cable running beneath the "superloo," an automated toilet.
homepage.mac.com /mattamsam/iblog/B1219703917/C1466372441/E1024235661   (130 words)

  
 Toilet Humour
toilet and next to him is a man standing at...
toilet by firefighters after she is locked inside by an attendant.
humour" version of Verdi's A Masked Ball is set in Spain just after Franco's death and opens with a group of male singers straining on...
www.netactics.co.uk /toilet_humour.html   (387 words)

  
 The Toilet WebRing
The Toilet WebRing is composed of sites celebrating, through art, humor, education, and plumbing, one of the worlds finest modern conveniences: the toilet.
Rats in the toilet is a growing epidemic.
The site allows you to VOTE for which way the Toilet Paper should hang on the holder [FRONT or BACK], which way to place Glasses or Cups in a closet [UP or DOWN], is it called Sauce or Gravy.
j.webring.com /hub?ring=toiletring   (595 words)

  
 Crap Jokes: Toilet Humour: Types of Poo
There's poo on the toilet paper, but not in the toilet.
You have to look in the toilet to be sure you did it.
Permanent skid marks are left in the toilet.
members.fortunecity.co.uk /dancannon/jokes/Toilet_Humour/Types_of_Poo.html   (405 words)

  
 Jokes | Funny UK Comedy
After laying in bed for a few minutes the old man lets out a loud fart and says "one-nil." His wife rolls over and...
Two men are occupying booths in a public restroom, when one calls to the other, "There is no toilet paper over here, do you have any over there?" The seco...
A man is having a pee in a pub toilet and next to him is a man standing at the urinal but without any arms.
www.funny.co.uk /jokes/cat_48-Toilet-Humour.html   (441 words)

  
 Customer fails to see the toilet humour   (Site not responding. Last check: 2007-10-18)
STOCKHOLM (Reuters) - A customer in an international hamburger chain outlet in western Sweden lost his appetite when he discovered the restaurant's toilet seats were being washed in its dishwasher alongside the kitchen utensils.
The man noticed on a visit to the bathroom in the restaurant in Arvika, Sweden, that all the toilet seats had been removed.
The employee tried to reassure the customer by saying that the freshly washed toilet seat would be warm and pleasant to sit on.
www.freerepublic.com /focus/news/789621/posts   (1203 words)

  
 Toilet Humour - GoXplore
Being 'explorers' often means that we get to see some of the greatest sights - the view from the top of a mountain, the sky at night, trees that are thousands of years old.
Also, another place we went the toilet was a stone outhouse, with no light.
In Nepal the 'toilet' or 's**t tent' is a 'chaarpi', if that is how it is spelled.
www.goxplore.net /showthread.php?p=3390   (510 words)

  
 Scotsman.com News - Latest News - Odd - Chinese furious at Taiwan star's toilet humour
Jessey Meng, who made a name for herself as an actress and a television presenter in China, joked about mainlanders' toilet habits to a chorus of laughter from fellow guests on the show "Red Storm" last week.
She regaled the host with a story about a toilet in a Chinese city where she had seen "hundreds of pale bottoms all lined up in a row".
Dubbed "toilet-gate", the video of Meng's on-air performance, which also included a swipe at Chinese state television, was posted on major mainland Web portal Sina.com, and generated more than a million posts from indignant Web surfers, state media reported.
news.scotsman.com /latest_odd.cfm?id=1324422006   (424 words)

  
 McDonalds Toilet Humour « Angry 365 Days a Year   (Site not responding. Last check: 2007-10-18)
McDonalds Toilet Humour « Angry 365 Days a Year
Well, there's a lot that made me angry on the drive back home but most off all I was angry at the conspiracy I uncovered at a roadside McDonalds.
It isn't enough that they're clogging colons with "food" deep fried in lard, they're clogging minds now with their filthy toilet humor in kids' Happy Meals.
angryaussie.wordpress.com /2006/06/24/mcdonalds-toilet-humour   (418 words)

  
 Talking Toilet Roll Holder
Our friends over at Gadgetryblog have found some high-tech toilet humor:
Just when you thought every possible benefit that technology could offer us has already been invented, somebody comes up this - the talking toilet roll holder ($14.98).
This is a toilet-paper dispenser with an in-built electronic micro recording thingy-ma-jig so that you can record a message, music or sounds on it - as many times as you like.
www.ubergizmo.com /15/archives/2005/04/talking_toilet.html   (108 words)

  
 toilet humour or intelligent humour?? - Interpol Message Board
thought toilet humour would win hands down, but think i've contradicted myself...
oh, also ! hate it when people laugh at intelligent humour just to show that they get it.
It was probably refreshing for the admissions officer to read that.
www.interpolnyc.com /forum/index.php?act=findpost&pid=316480   (602 words)

  
 UpdateF1 >> View topic - Kimi's toilet humour   (Site not responding. Last check: 2007-10-18)
Brundle observed that Raikkonen, 27, was the only driver to miss Pele's presentation of a gold trophy to Michael Schumacher, whom he replaces at Ferrari in 2007 and beyond.
What they didn't tell us about on the show was how all the Kimi fans charged into the toilets after seeing the interview on the big screens around the track and tried to souvenir his deposit.
All it proves is that he has rather weak bowels before a race.
www.formula-1.updatesport.com /community/viewtopic.php?t=3479   (1054 words)

  
 Tameside Advertiser - Tony’s great at toilet humour   (Site not responding. Last check: 2007-10-18)
The Advertiser funnyman, who brings Husband and Life to you each week, has been chosen as the first cartoonist-in-residence at The Lowry.
But visitors will have to spend a penny to see his sketches — displayed on the back of the toilet doors.
Tony, who lives in Gee Cross, Hyde, said: "At first I was told it would be 10 or 12 toilets then they came back and said there were 140.
www.tamesideadvertiser.co.uk /news/s/212/212530_tonys_great_at_toilet_humour.html?rss=yes   (466 words)

  
 Toilet Humour (via CobWeb/3.1 planetlab2.cs.virginia.edu)   (Site not responding. Last check: 2007-10-18)
Grunt and strain dead loud for 30 seconds and then drop a melon into the toilet bowl from a height of 6 feet.
Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.
Using a small squeeze tube, spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drop the wad under the stall wall of your neighbour.
homepage.eircom.net.cob-web.org:8888 /~nobyrne/toilet_humour.htm   (163 words)

  
 Sev Wide Web News
Today's addition to The Vault was the last Captain Edify cartoon I drew - some will say I stopped one cartoon too late.
Despite my efforts to create a spiritually uplifting cartoon, eventually my disturbing penchant for scatalogical humour was bound to reveal itself.
The topic is so dodgy, I debated whether I should even post it or not.
www.sev.com.au /news.php?articleid=2961   (102 words)

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